There are two phrases in our sixteen years of knowing each other that really stick out in my mind and in a way define our relationship. The first, spoken in the sarcastic and naive way of a thirteen year old girl. "Hi! Who the hell are you?" The second was spoken sixteen years later by a very determined man. "I meant what I said earlier. I'm never letting you go again." These two instances play over and over in my head just about every day. Would the second statement ever have happened if the first one had never been uttered?
We were thirteen and fifteen when we met. A mutual friend kept telling him that he had to meet me and eventually he dragged him over to my apartment to do just that. According to him, he was pretty much hooked right when those words left my mouth. Ever since then it's been me and him. Within a week or two he asked me out. I was in the pool with some friends when he asked me to come here. Naturally, there was no way my self conscious self was climbing out so I went over to the edge. He asked me out. I was thrilled but managed to very calmly say yes. I then proceeded to turn around and continue talking to my other friends. Lucky for me, he's always seemed amused by my personality and little quirks. Another boy may have been offended. Not him though. I will never forget how he leaned down and from the side of the pool, he wrapped his arms around me from behind and whispered "Thank you" in my ear. Thinking back on it I don't think I realized it then, but I'm pretty sure that was the moment he claimed my heart.
I didn't find out until later that I was his very first girlfriend. We dated off and on for a few years yet even when we weren't actually together, you wouldn't know it. Even if we were dating other people we still cuddled and talked and went places together. No matter what happened between us we always remained best friends. Nobody really ever understood our relationship. The biggest thing that people couldn't believe was that we were never sexual with each other, not even any real kisses. Even when we dated again after each of us had lost our virginity, we never went there. Not that the thoughts or opportunities weren't there, it just never seemed right. We were left alone constantly. My Dad loved him, he was always welcome in our home. No matter what time it was or even if I was grounded, Dad's answer to his knock at the door was the same, "Come on in."
When my step-mom came along she used to tell us that one day, one of us would move away (I did), we would marry other people and have kids (we both did), but that eventually we would end up together for good. She said that she would write this down and have it framed as our wedding present. That day is finally getting closer. Now this is where we might sound kind of backwards, especially if you don't know us or know much of our background.
Today I filed the next step in my divorce. I'll give you a moment to re-read that sentence...Remember before when I mentioned that we both married other people? Well after 10 years, 5 of those married, I'm finally getting my divorce. Now I have to start the paper work for Josh's divorce. I don't even know where to begin to explain the way my soon-to-be-ex-husband is. Although there were some good times, and I did get three wonderful children out of it, it was not a good match. I'll post some other posts from time to time from my blog I originally started to help explain some of that.
So now, almost 17 years and 7 kids later we're finally getting our chance. Don't worry, I'll post more later to help catch you up!
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